Bad news travels fast and bad news hits us like a ton of bricks.
Whether it's losing a loved one, losing a job, or receiving bad news about your health. All of a sudden the world is spinning at a million miles an hour. There is no way to stop it, so it’s tempting to get lost in its gravitational spin. After all, the numbness is weirdly comforting and makes it easy to just give up, but we CAN NOT GIVE UP!
We need to pull ourselves out of the spiral and focus on getting better, because life is worth living. In order for this to happen, bad news has to turn into good news. The journey is a long and difficult one, but the impossible is feasible with the following advice.
Embrace The Emotion
The first step the majority of us take when we hear something terrible is to avoid the negative emotion. We try and bury it down deep inside so as not to deal with the demons. However, a study by the University of California, Berkeley, found that this isn’t a wise move. Why? It’s because it causes people to feel stress more acutely. Patients in the test who embraced the negative emotion had lower levels of cortisol in their bodies. In short, they accepted the bad news and that helped them to relieve the tension.
When bad things happen to me, people think I'm crazy when I give this advice or are quick to say "It's not that easy". Yes it is! If what's done is done or there's no way you can change the outcome just accept things as they are. The quicker you are able to embrace it, the quicker you can move on.
Expose Yourself To The News
When we cope, we tend to think the best strategy is to limit exposure to the news. I mean, it's not like looking at an overdue credit card bill will make it go away. As we know all too well, it doesn’t, neither physically or mentally. In fact, it makes the brain obsess over the information more than ever and that leads to a spike in stress levels. Running away from the news isn’t a coping strategy; it’s cowardly. Repeatedly going over the info allows the brain to come up with an exit plan. When this happens, the consequences don’t seem as severe.
For instance, I recently shared with you in my latest post, WHAT THE F: LET'S TALK ABOUT FIBROIDS!, I shared with you how when I had no idea what fibroids were I totally freaked out. I was a little in denial about it and wanted to avoid knowing the truth thinking it would make me feel better. Ya know, "the less you know the better" type of mentality. When I began researching more about my condition. I was able to better understand what my options were to know what questions to ask my doctor.
Enter Fight Mode
Obsessing over the facts and coming up with a battle plan are great steps initially. Afterward, it’s time to put the idea into action and go into fight mode. Being proactive is an excellent way to game the verdict in your favor. Think about insurance companies and how they reject policies. Will embracing the news and exposing yourself to the letter then result in a payout? The answer is no. What will is forcing them to explain why claims for Liberty Mutual and other policies are discarded. Get it in writing, speak to a legal expert and go to court. That’s how to win deserved compensation.
Simple...when you know better, you do better. Put some action behind that knowledge and those plans. Don't talk about it, be about it!
End With A Silver Lining
There is nothing as straightforward as seeing the negatives. As humans, we are programmed to look at the dark side of life. That is why cognitive reframing is a fantastic partner in crime. The way it works is simple: look at bad news differently. Sure, your boss took away the job and you’re unemployed, and that’s not nice. However, it is also a great chance to try new things, like the career which you’ve been too scared to attempt.
In the past I've been fired from a job, and I was devastated! After the fact, I was able to reflect and remember how tired and stressed that job made me. It also made me learn a few things about myself, rest, and gave me time to think about what I really wanted to do in my career.